Oh wow. Thank you so much for writing this article. I am in the late stages of going through a divorce and I recognise my wife exactly in this post. She too is irrational and lashes out at everything. Screams and swears at me and then comes by layer sweeter than concentrated sugar all apologetic She has told at various times; my bank, my letting a agent for my property I rent out, workmen around the house I have a long relationship with and others, that they suck or they are charging too much or their work is rubbish. She is a bull in a China shop wrecking al manner of carefully curated professional relationships. She just can’t see herself. It’s a relief to know I’m not the only one who knows someone like this. But also like your when she is calm she is lovely and we co parent well. Thank you for writing this article. Makes me feel I’m not imagining the damage she does.